Monday, March 17, 2014

When the answers no...or not right now...

Sometimes I feel that life is going full on in the right direction and God is opening doors and all I have to do is keep walking through them! Those are the times that I love! ;) But recently that hasn't been the case. The doors aren't swinging wide open on the path that I had desired. Mind you, "The path that I desired." You see I had things all planned out about how this whole adoption thing was going to go and what my next year or so would look like.

Over the last month I have connected with several people, meet with other orphanage directors, lawyers and people at IBESR (social services). I got information, information that I, for the first time in a long time, felt was reliable information; needless to say I didn't get the answers that I necessarily wanted though.

I struggled. And if I'm honest I probably still am struggling with it all. But I also know that God is in control. I struggle that things in Haiti are never clear. There is no set direction or path for this adoption world. Information seems to always be changing--does anyone even know what the "new law" states?? It's things like this that make me want to scream and pull my hair out and bawl my eyes out.
But I always have to come back to the fact that just because things are going as "I" had planned for them to go, I know God has bigger and better plans...I just can't see that big picture right I pray and patiently wait for Him to guide me and lead me.

I know that my heart is in missions and in Haiti and it ALWAYS will be. I pray that I can continue to serve in Haiti for years and years to come. I know that God has put adoption on my heart and that He will bring it to completion in His timing with the child He has specifically chosen for me. These things I know and even though days can be hard and weary at times, He is in control and I have FAITH and TRUST in HIS PERFECT PLAN and TIMING!

So although it feels like the answers are no...or not right now...
God is in control and He knows the desires of my heart.  
A very fitting new piece of metal art. :) 

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